These 10 things parents should not do!
We often hear the phrase: “Children are getting harder to teach.
There are indeed many people who are convinced of this sentence, and they are also pessimistic about disciplined children.
Teaching different children uses different methods, and teaching the same child cannot always use the same method. This is something everyone knows, and therefore, some people regard child discipline as a very difficult task.The abandonment of the duty of discipline of children has caused some social problems to become increasingly serious.
Although society is changing, trends are changing, and ideas are also changing, there are some ways in which children are disciplined. This is something everyone knows, and as a result, some people regard child discipline as a very difficult task.The abandonment of the duty of discipline of children has caused some social problems to become increasingly serious.
In principle, the ancient and the modern are interlinked, and they have not changed so far. There are also some precepts that should be avoided, or they will cause some physical harm during the growth of the child.
The following are some of the problems we often hear and we are apt to commit. We call them the “Ten Commandments of Family Education”: The first commandment: Do n’t label children. Adults often speak and act, and will call children “idiots”, “Lazy like a pig “. etc. Critical discourses, etc., these negative evaluation words come into the child’s mind time and time again. Over time, he becomes his own negative self-awareness, and this self-awarenessZhi once these labels are cured is like a spell that can’t be swayed, and this life will lead this beloved child.
Don’t hurt him if you love him, how can we gradually curse and lead us to give up our crying blood and want to raise an adult child?
Second commandment: Do n’t over-protect. A child who is over-protected is just like a child who grows in a sterile room. Once out of the sterile room, it is inevitable that diseases will be repeated. Our baby is the same. Over-protection prevents him from being in a natural social state.Self-learning and growth, one day, he left his parents’ umbrella, did he discover how society is like this?
How is it different from being with your parents?
How can such excessive protection benefit our beloved baby?
The third commandment: Don’t doubt for no reason. Sometimes, before we find out something, we often insist that it is a good thing for our favorite child, threatening to threaten him to admit it, but often find out afterwards that we are wrong, and thenVery compassionate attitude, and want to win the understanding of the child.
And this unfortunate misfortune is almost a show that is repeatedly performed every time an incident occurs. Who can a trusted child believe?
The fourth commandment: Don’t chatter. “If you want your child to hate one thing, the best way is to keep talking to him.
I ‘m bombarded with mental fatigue. No one wants to be read endlessly. The best way is to use other methods of discipline instead of my old methods. I can only use the parents ’emotions.Vent to the child, let the child also infect these emotions, and he has nowhere to vent, only to develop some maladaptive behavior.
Fifth Commandment: Don’t Intimidate Bribery and Fraud If you often say, “I won’t finish your homework, I will kill you.
“One day he will surely find that his parents haven’t finished his homework before he finished his homework; or,” You finish the homework quickly, and I’ll give you ten yuan. ”
“One day, when you ask him to do something, he may start talking to his parents about the conditions.
Intimidation will destroy the relationship between parents and children, making him feel the parents’ affection; bribes make their children more utilitarian, and only willing to do things if they are favorable.
The sixth commandment: Do not let the child bear inappropriate punishment of guilt, or cause guilt to the child psychologically. The child will walk on the road of life with a heavy guilt, how can he create a better life?
When correcting a child’s mistake, just tell the facts, don’t criticize his personality because of this, speak more neutral language, and avoid creating a burden on the child’s heart.
Seventh commandment: Do n’t fight with the child. Poor parents ‘hearts, in order to love him and pull the child for his future. Sometimes, he ca n’t afford it, he ca n’t move.There is a low pressure in the air, so why not meet each other?
Children have time and toxicity to fight with their parents. Parents who are steadfast can still treat growing babies with understanding and sympathy.
The eighth commandment: Do n’t pull out seedlings to encourage children to live under the notion of “losing people but not losing ground”. Ask your child to learn this and that, regardless of the child ‘s maturity.Too much burden of growth, the happy growth process becomes breathless nightmare, how can pulling seedlings really help?
Let the children grow up naturally.
It takes time to grow up. The most important thing for parents is to provide a suitable environment for their children to grow up, not to replace them.
Ninth commandment: Don’t compare our children with each other completely. We often say that the children of the neighbors take one hundred points, and then use their neighbors as an example. The children also take one hundred points.
From now on, everything puts the child in comparison with others, rewarding the good and punishing the bad. Isn’t this destroying the child’s self-esteem?
Once the child’s self-esteem cracks, who is sad?
The tenth commandment: do not demand, do not force, and never give up on the child, parents give reasonable expectations, without too much extravagance, give appropriate guidance without excessive coercion, and no matter how bad the situation isFor blood-linked babies, you cannot give up lightly anyway.
Raising an outstanding child is not a matter of overnight. It is how much love, patience, and trials of growth that parents have paid before they can create a talented person for the country.
The above may give some references for parents, some reflections, some inspirations. If you use deep kung fu, you will naturally experience many wonderful methods. On the way to grow up with your children, you are all the wayGood weather in Lili.